In the Night

Have you ever been awaken in the middle of the night, not knowing the reason?  Suddenly you are seized from your sleep waking to a clear mind.  I mean really clear.  My first thoughts are, "Why am I awake?  Is there something that I neglected to do?"  I search through my mind trying to make the right decisions.  A few moments are spent doing this and doing that to remedy the perceived reason I was awaken from my sleep.  I think to myself, "It is waaaaay before dawn, I should still be sleep.  I have done what I was supposed to do.  Now I am supposed to be sleep."  Why am I still awake?  Tonight it was to send an e-mail, take some medicine.  But what about the subsequent three hours that follow?  What am I to do with that time?  I pray.  I ask God.  I wait.  I listen.  I wait.  I wait.  I write my first real entry to my blog.  Redeeming the time?  Ahhhhh, maybe.  Sometimes I believe I wake up to hear God's voice.  The day plays back like slides on an old-school projector.  I ask for forgiveness.  I think about the people in my life.  I pray.  Tonight I write, trying to figure out where my life is going.  I am not worried or scared, just wondering.  I think about scripture that keeps my heart at times of confusion or fear.  When I view my proverbial compass and the bar needle moves circuitously around North, East, South and West over and over again.  Spinning rapidly around the dial.   Although I might feel lost, forgotten, maybe even despondent.  I like to read Psalm 139.  In particular I like to look at verse 12:

Indeed, the darkness shall not hide from You,
​​But the night shines as the day;
​​The darkness and the light are both alike to You.

Psalm 139:12

I am reminded that God knows me perfectly, even if I do not.  My future, my past and even my present.  Although I grope with thoughts, emotions and physical discomforts in the night, I know that with God there is no darkness, but solely light.  He is the Father of lights.  And every good and perfect gift comes from Him.  Tonight that gift is sleep for me as I feel the drowsiness beginning to set in.  I hope that a gift for you could be this post.